20080215

Mixed Drinks

by Marie Mosley

Mike lives to use the store's loudspeaker. I can tell by the intense look on his face when he sees a kid flipping out by the pickle jars; it's like he's willing the flailing arms to sweep some Vlasics off the shelf so he can announce that we need a cleanup on aisle six. I think his loudspeaker lust is what makes him keep applying for a management position - he probably dreams about wearing the manager's headset and spending his days broadcasting corny puns about people who park in the fire lane. Dorky as he is, though, I have to admit that he made me laugh once. A few months ago, an old guy crashed a cart into an endcap and destroyed an entire display of half-price liquor. Mike commandeered the microphone at the customer service desk and hollered "Mixed drinks, aisle 10!" with such joy in his voice that I couldn't help but giggle as I went to get the mop.

6S - C3

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